The Graduation Moment.

I’m graduating.

In a single day I’ll be standing on a stage with a over sized gown and a square graduation cap on my head. Last night I gave a speech in which I intended leaving something of myself and the things I’ve learned to the rest of the world. It feels sort of like my entire of life is changing. I never quite realized how intense the emotion was of graduation. Until you get there, I don’t think you can truly understand it. It’s commonly called the end of one chapter of your life. That’s sort of what it feels like, but that phrase simply doesn’t convey the exact feeling. I don’t think words at all can quite convey the emotion and meaning I want to convey, but I’m going to try.

Graduation isn’t just starting a new chapter of your life. It’s more like ending one book in a series. But there’s a sequel, and you’re not sure if it’s going to ruin the story, or be ten times better. You might still be able to look back through the old book, but you can’t just flip through the pages to the last chapter and read everything again. You’ll never relive those moments. The laughter, the tears, the fits of rage, the arguments, the love, the fear, the anxiety, the growth and change and new things. It’s all been done now. All the people you loved so much, they’re there, but it’ll never be quite the same. The summer road trips and adventures, what you did with your free time. It’ll all change. The amount of fear, anxiety, anticipation, excitement, seclusion, joy, and contemplation that I’ve put myself through this past week is beyond words. It seems as though I’m relishing in the last couple pages of this book, so that way I’ll be sure that I got as much as I possibly could before moving onto the next book.

But I’ve already seen the cover and title of the next book, and even sneaked a small peak at a page, and I can’t help but want to rush into this new book as fast as I can, because something inside me is telling me that it’s going to be incredible. I want it to be incredible so desperately. So I’ve been sitting by myself in my own thoughts for a week or two. I’m not entirely sure why. Whether it’s because I’m mentally and emotionally preparing myself for what’s about to happen tomorrow, or if it’s because I don’t want it to happen at all. I seriously have no idea how I’m currently sitting here, typing all this. The countless number of events, words, and people that have brought me to where I am, giving me such encouragement and possibilities that I can’t help but remain speechless that I’m alive. I tend to notice the little things people do for me, and though I don’t always say anything about it, when I contemplate what I’ve done, I’m always able to remember the dozens of people that worked together or separately to get me to that moment. When I contemplate simply my age and graduation, that number of people just grows and grows, and I can’t possibly ever find a way to thank them all. I’ll certainly try to personally talk to as many of them as I can. In the meantime, I’ve been thinking about how in the world I became who I am.

I received a message from an old, online, sort of pen-pal of mine. I’ve always loved other cultures, and getting to talk with this person about their’s and their life was always loads of fun and I really got to know them quite a bit. The last message I got from them before this message was in 2013. After the torrential influx of memories that came when I read their message, I started to think back at who I used to be. I went back and read some of my messages, and things I used to do and talk about. The way I said things, the things I thought that were important, the ideas I had. The way I said things was a particular difference that I thought interesting, as it emphasized the different kind of person I am today compared to who I used to be. There’s already at least one blog post of mine that I’ve changed my perspective on some. I’m leaving it there however, because I want to be able to remember where I used to be, and where I am now. I want to be able to look back at the thoughts I used to have, and be able to see just how far I’ve come. There’s a certain special power in writings that capture the author in a way not much else can. Pictures see the physical differences, but the way we write and what we write about captures our mental differences. The different things that have affected us in so many ways are captured in our writing. I can tell small details in who I was back two years ago from some of those writings. Historic documents do this as well on a wider scale. We get a small picture of the way people in that culture thought, though one book only constitutes a single person, if you combine hundreds or thousands of books, you can start to build a bigger picture. Anyways, I digress. All this is to say, I’m glad I’m keeping a blog, if for no other reason than for my own benefit. As I keep growing and changing, I’ll be able to look back at who I was and learn from it. There’s always the possibility I’ll be able to bring back a perspective I used to have that I’ve lost.

I think this year and the events that are about to unfold are the most frightening of all. I’m leaving for University. I’ll be living on my own, (well, with a roommate, but you know what I mean.) and I’ll be living in a city I’ve only visited occasionally. I’ll be surrounded by people I’ve never met before in my life, and taking classes that I have no idea what to expect from. I’ll be essentially living an entirely new life as an adult. So, I guess I’m writing this as a sort of conclusion to this book. I’ll still have all summer, but it won’t be at school, and I’ll be plenty busy during all of summer. So basically, these past years have been amazing, life changing, and at times brutal. But here I am, I made it. So thank you everyone in my life who helped in the smallest way, or just tolerated my existence. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life.

 

In complete unbelief,

Josiah Serravalle.

Our Struggle with Being Complacent.

I’ve had a lot on my mind, but for once I seem to lack the words that are required to get my ideas across appropriately and effectively. My life has quickly become a mess of rehearsals, classes, extracurricular activities, and social gatherings. I find myself restless when I’m home, and stressed when I’m rehearsing. I’ve gone from wishing for things to do, to constantly hoping that I’ll be able to fit some free time in. Yet, as soon as I get time to relax for once, I find myself restless. I should be doing something. All this has made me realize that time is something I’m obsessed about. There’s something about it that captures my mind and draws me in. When I try to think of things that leave an impression on me, time constantly comes to mind. I suppose it’s natural. Time wrecks us all.

Time is funny though. It’s something that we have no concept of being without. Life without time is something we can’t process, yet we often wish that we had more of it. It’s tricky, it eludes us. When we’re busy with things we have committed to do, we find ourselves wanting to have more time relaxing by doing things we fully enjoy that require no responsibility. Yet, as I’ve learned, when we finally get an opportunity to relax, we often find ourselves restless. Like we could be doing something productive, or do something more. It’s a weird phenomenon where we want time, but we also don’t. There’s a certain balance that we simply can’t seem to find.

I’ve talked plenty about how I often get restless, in my Spirit of Freedom post. The more time I lose, the more restless I get with the time I have. I don’t fully understand it. Something about myself gets accustomed to the idea of constantly doing something, or moving, or being somewhere that I either feel uncomfortable at or where there’s simply different people there. While I both hate and love the restlessness, I found that it wears down on me on a physical level. As an introvert, I don’t find energy from people. I recharge alone with my thoughts. When I get to this level of restlessness, I lose the time I originally get to recharge. I didn’t even think about this until recently, when, after an especially long day at rehearsals where I constantly was surrounded by people, I found myself beyond the point of exhaustion. I slept through school the next day from sheer exhaustion. I had kept myself from recharging for so long from people, that it physically had a negative effect on me. Yet, even after that, the whole time I was home, I felt restless, like I should be at school. I’m reminded of a squirrel. For example, suppose a grown squirrel falls from a tree and breaks its leg. If left there, it’s left for dead. Fortunately, there’s a family living nearby who decides to pick up the squirrel against its will and nurture it back to health. The entire time it’s being healed, the squirrel constantly seeks to be back outside, even if it would damage and possibly kill the squirrel. Despite the fact that it’s being healed inside, its still restless to be back outside.

At the same time, if a squirrel is kept inside long enough, it grows accustomed to the lack of things to do. It becomes tame. It no longer feels the need to accomplish things outside. It becomes content. I suppose that’s where I was over the summer and the first semester. I grew accustomed and became satisfied with not accomplishing things. This becomes extremely dangerous, as if you don’t feel restless to do things, then how can you be productive, efficient, or even impact the world or people. But as soon as I got that taste of the wind and rain of the nature, I couldn’t stop seeking it. When I get exhausted, I simply needed restoration to go back out into the world. It only gets dangerous when I fall into the trap of being complacent.

There’s a difference to being unhealthily complacent, and healthily content. The word can be used in both circumstances, but one is negative and the other positive. Being content with your possessions and your life is one thing entirely different from being complacent with what you’ve done and where you are. Being content has to do with being satisfied with the things you have, but that doesn’t mean you become lazy and refuse to improve either yourself or the people you’re around.  To be content is a good thing, as it means that if you were to die in that instance, you would be happy. You could survive and find joy in where you currently are. You don’t require more things or more possessions or better, insert-whatever-you-may-want-here.However, that doesn’t mean you don’t try to keep being productive or just do things to barely pass by. You still do things with excellence, and you still pour into people’s lives. You step out of your comfort zone when you need to, because it makes you keep growing in your life. This is so important. You’re not self observed in your own world. Since you’re content with what you have in your life and the place you’re currently at, you’re able to reach out to other people and invest in their lives. You keep encouraging others to grow, and you’ll grow yourself. That way you’re content, but still moving towards where you need to be in your life. We as humans don’t tend to stay still.

To be complacent is different. Being complacent means that you’re not satisfied with where you are, but you’ll settle for it. One who is complacent no longer seeks out growth. They think they have stopped short of their destination and don’t care to try and keep moving. They do their lackluster work with the least amount of effort possible, and simply hope to continue in this way to make it through the day. They don’t try to grow, they hate being pushed out of their comfort zone and avoid situations that make them do so. This is extremely dangerous. They forget the things they’re meant for and simply decide to settle for the life they currently have. They lose sight of their potential and the importance of those around them. They stop influencing people or helping them to grow. They become stagnant in everything they do. There’s nothing quite as disgusting as stagnant water. Stagnant humans are just as disgusting. That may seem harsh and like a bold statement, but it’s true. I can certainly understand a break, or a rest, or a vacation; believe me, I love those. However, when you’re stagnant even in those, which you can be, it becomes dangerous and unhealthy. We’re meant to be involved in each other’s lives, not to get loaded and seclude ourselves on our mental island of selfishness. Trust me, this is coming from an introvert. Keep growing. Keep changing, keep reaching out to people and pushing yourself and others. It’s so much better than being complacent.

Keep growing,

Josiah Serravalle.

A Fear of Loss.

First of all, I’d like to preface this post with the fact that I got a job. Throw the confetti, bring out the cake, I actually managed to get a job, I know. Naturally, getting the job has made me think a lot about growing up and the future, so I thought I’d those thoughts with you all.

I think there’s a part of us that naturally contradicts itself. It’s this idea of growing up. Even when I think of the word I’m torn inside. I hate it, but love it. I want it, but I delay it. This is a delicate topic for me, and as I explain myself, I realize I’m going to have to be a bit vulnerable with you all. See, when I think of growing up, it involves a lot of things. Intricate details aside, this includes a job, a car, responsibilities, education, and a whole lot of choices and decisions that are exceedingly and increasingly important. Now. I’m decently okay with this idea of growing up in age and accepting responsibilities, and even though I have a real hard time with choices, I understand that it’s necessary and important. I also get that all this needs to be approached with wisdom, understanding, and maturity. Life isn’t a joke. However, when you talk about growing up in a more personality way, I sort of have this hard time agreeing and finding myself wanting anything to do with it. This idea of maturity I understand does not mean that you become some person you never were, nor that you can’t enjoy life anymore, and that with growing up means maturity. However, I find myself being sort of pushed into this mentality of “Oh, you’re not a kid anymore, stop acting so random and energetic and joyful. That’s simply unacceptable. You need to fit in. Be like everyone else. Be normal.” And that simply is something I refuse to fall into.

Along with that, I struggle a lot with the fact of leaving. When I talk about my future and when I think about it, I really don’t feel like I’m called to stay in my hometown my whole life, or to pursue my career here, but at the same time, every part of me doesn’t want to leave the incredible people I’ve met here who have become my family. Something that I struggle with and have been scarred by is the idea of losing people I care about. It’s therefore become a sort of fear of mine I guess you could say. The thought of leaving, and essentially starting my life completely over by doing so, honestly frightens me. I feel like doing so means I’m going to lose the family I’ve built in the city here. I know that even though they won’t be around, I’m not going to lose them, but there’s more to it than that. It means they won’t be involved in my life since I won’t be with them. Something I realized that’s the worst part about leaving to live somewhere else is the fact that the people from your original living area won’t be able to be involved in your life. Your ups and downs, daily struggles and successes won’t be rejoiced or comforted by those so far away. The future you build there can’t possibly be shared with those people anymore unless you return or they join you. Those late nights where you just hang out, goof off, and act like general goons create such incredible memories that I never want to give up. Experiences I’ve had and continue to have with these people have made my life a joy, and helped me get through some really difficult times in my life. Distance is such a pain, and a destroyer of relationships more often than not. Something I value probably the most in any kind of relationship is the idea of sharing life together. Both parties needs to be able to go through life with the other, like a family does. No matter what. I don’t want to know that if I wake up one morning with a heavy heart, and a craving for a chaotic adventure, that I’ll have to do it alone. The goons I’ve grown with in this city won’t be there with me anymore. Even that though, there’s more to distance than that.

Recently in life, I’ve realized that losing someone doesn’t really necessarily mean cutting yourself off from them, or being separated. There’s something that’s specifically mentally about it. If you think that you’ve lost them, even if they’re around you plenty, then it’s almost just as if they left and moved. There isn’t a physical distance, but there’s a disconnect in your attitudes and conversation. You act differently and sort of close yourself off. You justify your actions, but it’s not really an excuse. It’s entirely your own fault for the way you act around them. There’s this sort of wall one of you puts up. And that creates a distant entirely of itself that can be just as devastating. As soon as that wall breaks down though, it’s as if you finally got to come back home after weeks of being gone. This also, though not as frightening, still terrifies me at times. I can’t imagine being shunned and distanced from those that I hold closest. Losing that person, losing their respect, their attention, their opinions, their words, their ideas, their trust, and just their overall friendship and relationship is devastating to me. If I lose someone in that sense, I’m just as shocked and traumatized as if I moved out of town.

Naturally, both of these things I’m having to confront as I “grow up.” The closer I get to graduating high school, the closer I am to moving and leaving practically everyone I know. The more I get into my job, and face responsibilities and the consequences of my actions, I’m left making choices that I don’t want to make. And as a result, I end up losing people I love through walls as well. Either by mistakes, by not thinking, or by them choosing to leave me, it all brings reality crashing down on me. And eventually, I will have to leave a lot of the people I love, and it’ll probably be the most traumatizing, terrifying experience of my life. But at the same time, it’ll lead to so many new incredible people and opportunities that I would never have been able to meet or experience. And so, I’m simultaneously ecstatic to “grow up,” and also terrified. Either way, I know that it’ll be an incredible experience that will definitely change my life. So here’s to growing up, and to losing as few people as possible. I know that no matter what, the plan for my life will be something I could never imagine, and that it’ll all be wonderful in the end. I’m trusting in God that He’ll guide me through this stage of my life as I grow. And so I continue sharing life with those that I love the most while I still can. And no matter where I go or what happens, those memories will be with me forever. I’ll never forget those that I love.

“Growing up”,

Josiah Serravalle.

Senior Day (And Senioritis)

It’s been awhile. Anyways, for my high school, graduation is right around the corner. (Literally, it’s tomorrow.) And though I’m a junior, and not graduating, I’m becoming a senior. Which means it’ll be my last year as a high school student. Kind of a crazy thought. Now, you might be wondering what all that has to do with anything. Well, this senior class has been my favorite classes, and the class I’ve grown the closest to out of all my years at school. So, I’ve dedicated this post to listing each one of them and listing off someway they’re special or have impacted me. Some I know better than others, but all together they really sort of made me into the person I am today. The school I attend is extremely small in comparison to most schools, so the reason I can list all the seniors, is because we have a small number in the class (Though, it’s a large class for our standards). Anyways, enough explaining, onto the people.

Jessica, I know that you are for sure not disappearing on me anytime soon, but still. You’re one of my best friends ever, and we’ve both gone through a lot with the other around to help. All your random hilariousness will never be matched or forgotten. I know I’ll always be able to be myself, and be crazy and just laugh away life with you around. Thank you so much for being able to support me in the little things. It means more than you might think. No matter what happens, I’ll always remember you, and you better freakin’ keep in contact ya freakin’ goon. Keep doing amazing things for Christ, He’ll take you to some crazy but wonderful places. Don’t stop being yourself and being able to laugh. Also, don’t stop eating. There’s so much food to eat. Italian life for life.

Danny, I remember the first day you came to school, and when I heard you were a writer. I got pretty excited, and when I found out how awesome you were too, that just made me happier. Keep writing, being awesome, and making crazy jokes. Always keep seeking out your dreams, and don’t grow old. Also, don’t be afraid to share your stories with the world. You’re awesome man.

Ana, it’s great to know someone else shares my love for all things Doctor Who and Sherlock. Also, your snarky comments and love for writing (stories), are greatly appreciated. Keep writing and..commenting? Don’t stop being yourself and loving the things you love. It’s awesome.

Braton, you’re a punk man. But in a good way. Love you dude. You’ve helped me find a love for others that I didn’t have before. You’re enthusiasm and love for pretty much everything is brilliant and has impacted me more than you know. Even though your hugs and bites are kinda really weird, it’s all good. Keep being confident, bold and loving on people with all you got for Christ. It’s going to impact people.

Adam, keep encouraging people and being funny. It’s some really good dang traits that have made my days a lot better. Also, keep singing dude. You have a fantastic voice, don’t be afraid to let others hear it. Be confident in what you want to do and do something awesome out there. It was awesome having you as a member on the baseball team, keep it real. Is that still a normal saying? I don’t even know.

Jack, keep leading and putting yourself out there. You’ve definitely impacted me in the way you’re willing to defend what you believe or think is right, no matter what it is. Even if it’s which way to put on a belt. You’re confidence is great, and you definitely are gonna be a great leader out there. Keep being a genius and doing what you’re called to do. Lead people towards Christ with your attitude, confidence and love.

Nathan, you’ve made some of my days bearable simply by stating in your tone of voice how unbearable some days are. You’re humor and attitude towards people is absolutely hilarious and it brightens my day all the time. High school definitely won’t be the same without you there to make sarcastic conversation with. Also, you’re a phenomenal singer, and are the backbone to the tenors. It’ll be really tough without you. Anyways, it’s been great to be able to hang out some more as the school year ends. Don’t lose that humor ever, and don’t forget that sometimes us weirdos don’t have it all together, but we still love you, and you’re a part of the family. If that makes any sense. You get the point.

David, you’re pretty much a boss. You’re strange philosophical random points that don’t always make sense have always baffled and confused me. Which is good in a way. You make sure you think the thoughts no one else does. Your hard work can be seen by your dedication to sports like football and yet still being super interested in things like robotics and scouts and doing good in school.  That kind of hard work is brilliant, so don’t lose it. You’ll go some pretty sweet places.

Daniel F., It’s the Freeman! Anyways, Daniel, it’s been great to have you next to my math class at SF. I’ve greatly appreciated our random small rants there about school, life, and your sweet bow. Your creations in drawings and movies are phenomenal, I for sure look forward to seeing some of your stuff in the days to come. You have some awesome imagination, and so be sure to never waste it. It’s wonderful, and I wish I had that much imagination. Use that gift wisely, I’m sure you will. You’re awesome.

Daniel B., Oohhhh Daniel.  Dan the Man, despite not being able to get to know you very well, since you often keep to yourself, you’re pretty much a genius. And keeping to yourself isn’t a bad thing either, it’s kind of better to be that way than in everyone’s face. Anyways, your quips are hilarious, and you’re also pretty much a genius. You’re goin’ places kid. Don’t forget it.

Taylor A., You’re pretty much the coolest kid. It was always nice and comforting to me to know that I wasn’t the only one who was generally quiet. (Though I sort of stopped being generally quiet, that’s my Italian genes there.) You can always make an atmosphere seem calm and cool, and it was an honor to be able to talk to you occasionally. Also, you’re Batman, so there’s not much else to say there. Keep saving people’s lives.

Clint, Oh my word. Clint, you’ve easily been one of the most influential people in my life at high school these past couple of years. It’s hard for me to even describe it. The way you handle music, life, relationships with people, and how you’re able to just have Christ’s love shine through you is something amazing. God is going to use you in ways we can only imagine man.  Your voice and talents are an amazing gift that I wish I had like you do. It’s going to be really hard to see you leave, but I know it’ll be great for those that you’re going to be with. I’m going to miss you man. You’ll do great.

Jamison, mister president. Honestly, I’ve always sort of thought you were a punk. But I’ve realized throughout the years that you’re much more than that. You’re a leader, who can be responsible and is confident in everything he does. You’ve taught me that no matter how serious and important something is, that doesn’t mean you can’t have fun, or that you can’t make some crazy joke. Despite almost always having something to say, you take responsibility for your actions and it’s impactful. You led the baseball team well, and the senior class. Keep having fun and leading man. You’re pretty legit.

Kameron, Oh Kam. You’re the reason I started to play baseball, and though it was a lot of work, I’m glad you got me into it. It was a lot of fun, and I made tons of memories for it. So thank you. Also, you’re awesome and always up for a laugh. Keep being a fantastic friend to everyone you meet, and loving those around you. Though you might not always think you’re leading, you certainly are. So keep leading those under you by your example and attitude.

Jenny, I hardly know you at all, but that’s probably mostly my fault for being a bit of a recluse. However, I know that you’re always joyful and ready with a smile on your face. It seems like you’re always open for encouraging people and that your joy and laughter is really contagious. Don’t ever stop smiling and looking at the good things in life. We all need some really good optimism in our lives.

Taylor H, I also don’t really know you that well. Which I feel kind of bad about, since my brother knew you decently well. Again, that’s just me being a recluse. Anyways, you’re always open to crazy jokes and just having fun. Your laughter is contagious and great. All I gotta say is; keep being a zebra. Nobody will hunt you down. I promise. I think.

Ben, even though you probably won’t read this, you’re hilarious and talented. It might seem like everyone else around you is a bit crazy, (we kind of are, but that’s besides the point), but you’re able to put some sense into things and still make the simplest things hilarious. Keep being yourself and don’t worry about what others think. Keep using that mind of yours and the imagination you’ve been given. You got this Ben.

Sarah, I never really got a chance to tell you, but I really love horses. Yeah. Used to ride them when I got a chance at my parents’ friend’s house, and went trail riding some with my family friend. And though I don’t know nearly as much as you do about them, I know they’re phenomenal. I also wish I got to know you a bit better, but I know that you’re full of plenty of talent and that you’ll succeed at pretty much whatever you want to do. I’d definitely trust you with my horses if I had any. You can also handle those techies like no one else. You’re going to do great out there.

Ellie, you’re fantastic. Your little encouragements and bursts of happiness are phenomenal and uplifting like you wouldn’t believe. Keep being yourself, and I really appreciate your comments, especially when in a car while I’m being antisocial. There’s nothing quite like your smile and love for everyone you meet. It’s outstanding and impacting. Always love others like you do, and just displaying Christ’s love for everyone so openly. It’s a wonderful gift and trait to have. The people out there need you to share it.

Jake, you’re a goon. But a good goon. You have a really friendly sort of attitude, and you’re always up for joking around. Not to mention you’re a phenomenal athlete, and you can for sure go some crazy awesome places using that athleticism. You’ll be great out there. Keep having fun and being willing to help others out.

Timothy, you’ve changed a lot over the years. But it’s been a good change. You’ve been given a plethora of gifts, like your voice and academic excellence, and I know they’ll be put to good use. You got a head on your shoulders, but you’re also able to enjoy the little things, have a sense of humor, and be up for having fun. Keep singing, playing Starcraft II, and bothering Nathan’s life as much as you can. Mwhaha. It’s been great to have you as part of the “geek squad” here, if you can call it that. It won’t be the same without you.

Sean, I also didn’t really get to know you very well, besides the few times I got to eat lunch with you guys. I can tell though that you’re excellent at planning and leading events. You’ve got plenty of good ideas that are sure to come to the light some day. At the same time, you’re hilarious and you and your brother are kind of even more hilarious together.

Andrew, it’s been fantastic to get to know you more this school year. I can’t believe it took me this long to see how awesome you are. Our game conversations and news conversations in Economics and Government kept me awake and actually interested in things that early in the morning. I’m not sure how I would’ve handled that class without you. You’re not only smart, but you’ve got wisdom, and that’s even more important. Not to mention you have a dedication for things that I only wish I had. Together, those two traits are going to take you great places. You’re awesome, I’m glad I got to know you, and it won’t be the same here without you. Also, dirty white boyz all the way. (That’s a sort of inside joke. In case you couldn’t tell.)

Christian, though I didn’t really get to know you very well, you seem like a guy that really is set on chasing after his dream. And that’s encouraging. Keep chasing that dream. Also, your always up for a joke and saying something unexpected. Don’t worry about those trying to crush your dream. Keep loving people and being a pretty cool dude.

Pheeewww. That’s a lot. But that’s everyone. If you expected more, I’m sorry, I’m kind of tired, so I started to trail off there for a bit. Anyways, as I finish this, I realize I’m going to soon be a senior like these students. And it’ll be phenomenal, terrifying, wonderful, depressing, but overall an experience I won’t ever forget. And for that, I’m looking forward to it. It’s a shame I won’t get to share it with these students that are leaving, but that just means there will be new people for me to reach out to and have impact my life. I’m looking forward to it. However, even today I’m finding myself with terrible senioritis. It’s going to be a long year.

 

With Honesty and Sincerity,

Josiah Serravalle.